Michael Canzian — Friendships Post-pandemic: How Did It Impact Our Relationships?
Relationships have been redefined throughout the pandemic. It prompted us to reevaluate the people in our lives-from the community in which we belong to the relationships to which we are committed to those with whom we share our homes. Indeed, it also gave us plenty of time to reflect on ourselves, leading us to prioritize our mental health more than ever. We had to cope with the different challenges that we faced-strengthening our ability to survive various situations despite the setbacks. Because of that, we were able to recognize people that truly matter.
Meeting people over online applications was the epitome of our social lives during the pandemic. Being on video calls was one of the ways we could maintain our friendships. We were able to discover methods that would still allow us to build meaningful relationships. Netflix Party was even invented so that people would be able to watch movies together even if they were thousands of miles away from one another. Moreover, in navigating those meaningful relationships, we recognized current or future relationships that may have had an opposite effect including anxiety or tension to our situation. Friends who did not reach out when they were needed most or no longer aligned with our newfound beliefs and perspectives of the current situation or chose to debate social, political, or economic issues. The stress and restraints of the pandemic also shed light on how some relationships do more harm than good.
COVID-19 and the isolation
Friendships have been proven to be essential to our physical and emotional well-being. It increases our sense of belonging and purpose, boosts our happiness and reduces our stress, improves our self-confidence and self-worth, helps us cope with traumas, such as divorce, serious illness, job loss, or the death of a loved one, encourages us to change or avoid unhealthy lifestyle habits, such as excessive drinking or lack of exercise ( Mayo Clinic, 2019). Without friendships, it can be difficult to manage our emotional and social needs.
Due to the lessened contact with friends, the isolation took a toll on people’s mental health. Some found it difficult to connect with people online given that there are a lot of limitations. The lack of physical presence and the limited freedom to enjoy things together is incomparable to bonding with them in person. Conversations are still being had, but the infrequency of human contact verbally and physically and the inability to provide support being that all were impacted by the pandemic changed the dynamics of many relationships. Most people felt that communication gap during the pandemic; even in online classes, learners were limited to interacting through their screens.
An ongoing COVID-19 social study conducted by students from the University College of London revealed their data from March to April 2020 -they surveyed more than 70,000 people and asked them to rate their levels of loneliness with a 4-point rating scale, ranging from “never” to “always”, with higher scores indicating greater loneliness. Their data revealed that the majority of the respondents had a score ranging from 4.5 to 5. In the findings, they highlighted that “Loneliness levels have been higher amongst younger adults, those living alone, those with lower household income levels, and those with an existing diagnosed mental health condition.”
For those who acquired COVID-19, they had to isolate themselves even more. They were unable to come into close contact with their family members, which led them to crave that comfort, support, and connection. Some may have experienced feelings of shame or guilt for having COVID-19 leading them not to disclose any information to their friends. Also, during this time period, certain friends may have been unable to reach out to them. The loss of encouragement and comfort added to feelings of loneliness during their isolation. This was also the time that they were able to recognize the friends that will be there for them in times of need.
Friendship dynamics
Due to the lockdowns and the limited freedom to spend time with friends, most people were able to reconnect with their personal interests and hobbies. This may have led to a change in perspective in various aspects of their lives, allowing them to recognize the people who contributed to their growth or can continually support their personal development.
Reconnecting with their friends post-pandemic may have also prompted them to realize that the bond was not the same as in the past. While the initial tension may be natural, it may also be due to other issues such as the change or clash of interests, lack of connection, and changes to one’s priorities.
Beck (2015) explained that “friendships are unique relationships because, unlike family relationships, we choose to enter into them. And unlike other voluntary bonds, such as marriages and romantic relationships, they lack a formal structure. You wouldn’t go months without speaking with or seeing your significant other (hopefully), but you might go that long without contacting a friend.” Indeed, a number of low-maintenance friendships last for years and even decades-this is where its beauty lies. However, when it is accompanied by the lack of understanding from one or both parties, this is where the friendship continually or eventually fades. Part of friendship is understanding that people change as they age, this also indicates the change of dynamics is part of the process. While this is the reality, some people see this in the context of “make it or break it.” This may have a significant impact on their mental health, prompting them to let go of the friendship than compromising for the sake of keeping it.
Resilience is an innate human capacity. Quality relationships foster our growth; the people in our lives teach us how to work through the ups and downs of life. They teach the essence of kindness, love, gratitude, anger, sadness, forgiveness, and a lot of other things. Through these relationships, people grow in the most unexpected ways. The post-pandemic may have led to rekindling or falling out of friendships, however, one thing is for sure-people grew and realized who and what matters most in their lives.
Originally published at http://michaelcanzian.wordpress.com on September 27, 2021.